Charlogy Online

Friday, June 09, 2006

Know Ye the Signs

Another day, another remake. Stephen King believes the essence of good horror to be supernatural representation of natural fears - in the case of The Omen, Will having kids ruin my life? And the answer is, if they are the glowering bowl-barnetted brood of Anne Robinson, emphatically yes.

It is the last shot however that really makes me shiver. As the pre-school spawn of Satan having despatched his parents grips the hand of the US President and turns to camera with a Weakest Link smirk, only then does the terrifying apocalyptic significance become clear. Yes - the President of the United States is being advised by five year-olds!

10 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Not seen this yet (probably won't bother either, at least at the cinema) but the original 1976 film contains my all-time-favourite decapitation scene, as David Warner has an unfortunate pane of glass/neck interface.

11:42 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I am boycotting this film as I am disgusted at the premise. The idea that the public will be chilled and spooked by the fact they it is being released on the 6th of the 6th 2006 is just stretching it too far. It is nearly as weak as "This film is about a child. he SAT AN cried often" you can't string unconnected numbers together and pretend that it is scary. I suspect that the weak tagline is ironically a bad omen for the movie!

Anyway, a much better way to spend 2 hours is to visit this website http://www.chucknorrisfacts.com/

"Who are you?"
"I'm the party pooper."

12:12 am  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Anyone else sick of the ridiculous jocks, who can't stand the thought of England winning a single game? Honestly, when I read that the Daily Records editorial said that Scotsmen who hope England do ok should be ashamed of themselves, I don't think to myself "Wow, those scots are so proud and patriotic. They are fiercly honest and true to themselves and I am full of respect for the integrity of their stance." No, I think "Those petty, small minded, insecure scotch eggs. Collect your dole, buy yourself a month's supply of deep fried mars bars, wash them down with gallons of cheap whisky and tell each other that the scottish premiership is not a second rate pub league. And that wearing kilts is different from skirts."

I'd give them independance in a heart beat and sit back and wait for them to descend into the war torn, third world, poverty stricken dump that they are only prevented from being vomited into by maintaing links with a proper country.

In your face Connery.

6:20 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Re: Scottish nationalism. I couldn't agree more with what Mark said. I'm an ardent Unionist myself, and particularly despise the way English taxpayers have to fund stupid New Labour projects like the Scottish parliament. I am equally peeved that they get a vote on English issues, but we get no say on Scottish.

Let them see how they get on without us, then when they see their folly, we can have a proper United Kingdom again, and put this whole devolution nonsense in history's dustbin.

By the way, this is in no way an endorsement of football or the world cup, which I personally cannot stand. I am very happy for England to win as long as I don't have to watch it.

7:18 pm  
Blogger Charlie said...

Disclaimer: the views expressed in the Comments section of this blog do not necessarily represent those of the blog's author. Although maybe they do - haha, I'm not saying! Suffice it to say that I find any kind of self-pitying victimhood a deeply unattractive trait whether on the part of an individual, a group, or a nation.

I'd just like to add, please do feel free to hijack discussion threads for any kind of rant - it's not like you could get your own blog for that or anything.

I'm joking of course. The Charlogy is a richer world for having you all!

"He said you killed Mozart."
"Mo who?"
"Zart."

11:23 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

For those of you who were thrilled that Australia were beaten and robbed of yet more sporting bragging rights, I include the piece below from the BBC website. On a personal note, I am truly happy that the 'culprit' was lucas neil. He is the one player who has needlessly hacked and kicked everything in sight for the whole of last season. Calling him 'dirty' is an understatement of the highest order. It was immensely satisfying to see him at last make a legitimate challenge and be punished for it. Serves him right for being such a git.

Anyway, here is that BBC piece. Enjoy.

Aussies may also be interested in this take on "impartiality in sports broadcasting" from China's most popular TV commentator.
According to the Associated Press, this is how Huang Jianxiang relayed the moment when Fabio Grosso went down under Lucas Neill's "challenge" in the last 10 seconds of the match to the millions of Chinese viewers on state-run CCTV.


"Penalty! Penalty! Penalty! Grosso's done it,
Grosso's done it! The great Italian left back! He succeeded in the glorious traditions of Italy! Facchetti, Cabrini and Maldini, their souls are infused in him at this moment! Grosso represents the long history and traditions of Italian soccer, he's not fighting alone at this moment! He's not alone!"

More was to come when Francesco Totti converted the spot-kick.

"Goooooal! Game over! Italy win! Beat the Australians! They do not fall in front of Hiddink again! Italy the great! Left back the great! Happy birthday to Maldini! Forza Italia! The victory belongs to Italy, to Grosso, to Cannavaro, to Zambrotta, to Buffon, to Maldini, to everyone who loves Italian soccer! Hiddink ... lost all his courage faced with Italian history and traditions ... He finally reaped fruits which he had sown! They should go home. They don't need to go as far away as Australia as most of them are living in Europe. Farewell!"

Huang later said he couldn't remember what he had said in the heat of the moment and his preference for
Italy was because he had commentated on Serie A for many years.

"I'm more familiar with Italian players ... and I don't like Australians indeed. I was hoping they'd do badly."

8:44 pm  
Blogger Charlie said...

I notice Huang omitted to mention the other glorious Italian tradition of being completely over-rated which was also on full display yesterday evening: "Del Piero! Totti! Gilardino! Pirlo! Perrotta! Gattuso! Heroes all! Coasting freely on the warm currents gushing from the arse of their overblown reputations! Who needs to create anything when we have such sublime egos in the glorious azzuri? And if we go out (again) to a bunch of part-timers we can always say we were persecuted for being too beautiful."

2:34 am  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Yes, hard one to call really. I hate the Italian style of play, which basically consists of boring the opposition into submission before catching them falling asleep from the slow repetition of passes in their own half, suddenly hurling a Totti gob in a defender's eye and thus rendering him blind at the crucial moment to win 1-0. The Italians talk about how it is their God-given right to win the World Cup which is not unlike the English press in some ways.

The Austrailians are always a team I want to see beaten probably because they're usually rather good and usually you hear about it. Cricket or Rugby - just beat the Aussies, I don't care how, randomly scatter balls on their training ground for them to accidently stand on and injure themselves, whatever, I don't mind.

But as for football I really wanted them to beat the Italians. Could you imagine the headlines in Italy if it had happened? It would have been the Italian equivalent of 'We waz robbed!' Or something like 'Hodwinked by Hiddink!' You'd never read the reality (as touched on by Chas):

Today, finally, we saw the real Francesco Totti. He was crap!

4:12 am  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Actually, thinking about it, that's doing Totti a diservice. Gobbing ability aside, he's a steaming pile of overated poo!

4:19 am  
Blogger Charlie said...

Another reason to want Australia to do well in football is that success on the soccer pitch might siphon youngsters away from cricket and mean we could win the Ashes more than once in a generation.

And agreed - after about half a dozen years or so we may finally get to see the 'real' Totti, as the man himself promised - and yes! an individual as capable of delivering on the world stage as - er, Del Piero anyone?

5:11 am  

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